GROWN UPS 1/4
Universal Pictures, Rated PG-13
Vanity is not exactly an uncommon celeb trait, which is why letting a bunch of them loose in the movie brainstorming boardroom is likely an ill-advised idea. Witness two films currently hitting the screens: First, regal Brit Helen Mirren, directed by hubby Taylor Hackford, as first choice to play—I kid you not—a tough-talking leader of a Vegas brothel. And then Adam Sandler, hitting the keyboard as script writer for Grown Ups, a comedy about, well, Adam Sandler.
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Directed by Dennis Dugan (You Don’t Mess with the Zohan, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry) and written by Adam Sandler and Fred Wolf, Grown Ups stars a bunch of Sandler’s pals who play a bunch of Sandler’s pals. Lining up to compete for one-upmanship in flexing their arrested development skills are: Marcus (David Spade) a suspect professional slacker with no visible means of support; Eric (Kevin James), an underachiever furniture salesman with a possible bladder problem who’s stuck with a wife succumbing to serious breastfeeding separation issues; Kurt (Chris Rock), a flustered house husband regularly nagged at home by everybody about his lack of domestic duties; Rob (Rob Schneider), the sex nut trophy boy toy vegan spouse married to an older woman (Joyce Van Patten); and Sandler as Lenny, a famous Hollywood agent saddled with entitlement-challenged kids who could be even more spoiled than his clients, along with a frosty fashion designer wife (Salma Hayek).
(From L.) Chris Rock, Kevin James, Rob Schneider, David Spade and Adam Sandler in Grown Ups
The low-energy narrative centers around a getaway reunion of these childhood friends to share memories of their departed school basketball coach who supposedly shepherded them into manhood. And—wouldn’t you know it—while the gabby ensemble lounges about, conversation turns to topics like rotund mother-in-law flatulence jokes, providing more mutually supportive laugh tracks than actual laughs.
Based extensively not only on Sandler’s coming-of-age reminiscences but also his midlife crisis and dealing with problematic parenting, the ironically titled Grown Ups is an auto-biopic gross-out veering into home movies territory that should have been left there—OK, so you’re caught in an identity crisis between being a dirty joke kinda guy and doing the authoritarian dad thing. We get it already.
