You know that feeling you get when you’ve been waiting to get a thing, and then you finally get it? That feeling of desire and agonizing wait and fulfillment and satisfaction? That feeling of “Oh, wow, I need that!” and “Yes, finally, I got it!”?
I had that this past weekend, when I installed Windows 7 on my laptop. It was wonderful in a pursuit-of-progress-yet-superficial way, like having an up-to-date exterior put on your old car because it improves aerodynamics but also makes everyone think you’ve got a brand new ride. (To anyone in need of writing advice—a car can be used as an analogy to pretty much anything.)
I had to tell someone how great it was, so I went to sign onto Instant Messe…why isn’t my mouse moving? I can’t move my mouse—How do you use a laptop without a mouse? The trackpad? Are you kidding? It’s the size of a postage stamp. Maybe I can print out an error repor…why can’t I print anything?! OK, OK, I’ll just fire up iTunes and put on some Justin Bieb…I CAN’T HEAR ANYTHING! I CAN’T HEAR ANYTHING!
Initially I thought I was having a stroke. But, as it turns out, Windows 7 and my laptop just weren’t getting along, like putting diesel fuel in a car that takes unleaded (see?). Not entirely unexpected.
First, the sound. I know a little bit about how computers function, so I guessed the issue was a lack of an audio driver, causing the sound card, made by a company called IDT, to not be recognized (imagine a car without…sorry). I went to Dell’s Web site to get the driver, but no luck. Surely Google can find the answer, so I searched for “Dell Windows 7 Sound Drivers.” The first three results were all for Dell’s downloads page, which I already discovered was positively useless. But the fourth was a thread in their support forum.
The initial post was someone with the same problem, but on a general scale—Apparently Dell doesn’t have audio drivers for any sound cards made by IDT that work for Windows 7. About 15 people chimed in, enforcing the problem and explaining what makeshift fixes they attempted and the results. Then, halfway through the second page, some breaking news from Round Rock, Texas’ sawaddi—IDT does not offer driver support to end users (us), and Dell only offers driver support on new products. We were up shit’s creek without a paddle—or sound.
There was anger. There was rage. There was screaming (but I couldn’t hear it). Two additional pages of virtual venom being spewed at Dell, IDT and sawaddi for his/her aural-crushing info. But then, hope—jeezy (location unknown) went all MacGyver and used a driver from one of Dell’s new laptops—the one that succeeded his—and it worked. Well, sort of—he/she could get audio from the speakers, but not headphone jack. Progress.
Then, shortly after jeezy pushed the envelope, euro888 threw a stamp on it and put it in the mail. He/she posted step-by-step instructions on which driver to use, how to install it and where to move files around until things are audible again. I was skeptical, until euro888 said he/she had the exact same model laptop as I. A download and reboot later and I was listening to “Chocolate Rain” again.
If it took me four hours to solve that problem, it took awhile. Four hours. Try imagining how this would have played out if that support forum thread didn’t exist. There would have been repeated phone calls to Dell and IDT and at least one laptop thrown out a window, all over the span of days, if not weeks. Instead, because of this thread, I saved time and sanity. Everything I would have tried, all the avenues I would have gone down, were already attempted and traveled, and the final solution was thoroughly explained and verified with others. For all the idiocy and insanity and affronts to humanity Internet forums are known for (hi, skateboarders), they also are instrumental in gathering people with common interests to convene.
As for the other two problems: I’ve been unable to fix the mouse and printer. I found a thread for the mouse, where a Microsoft representative posted a solution that was promptly shown to do nothing; the printer issue I’ve yet to take on. But again, imagine trying to call out a Microsoft rep over the phone:
“It doesn’t work!”
“Yes it does!”
“NO IT DOESN’T!”
“THEN BUY A MAC!”
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Do you know how hard it is to use a computer without sound? How am I supposed to watch Rick Astley all weekend if I can’t hear him crooning that he’ll never give me up?!
